there’s no sound

[Adapted from a log with a friend]
[Me] Family sucks.
[Friend] Why?
[Me] My brother’s being a total dick to me. I just built him a fucking PC and he can’t even be civil. He expects and demands that I give him parts of MY PC to get his working, because my parents can’t afford all the accessories right now. (RAM cost too much, I told them to wait.)
[Friend] Phbbt. Fuck him. My brother pulls shit like that.
[Me] So my parents ask that I give him one of my chips.
[Friend] Hell no.
[Me] I don’t mind. I have two 128’s he’d be paying me back anyway. My voodoo was the main reason my PC’d crash so much. Solution: Give [Brother] voodoo (since he’ll be running 98. Voodoo3 3500 doesn’t run well in 2k) I get new video card. I don’t get what I was promised.
[Friend] >_<
[Me] I get some POS Radeon that’s about a tenth the power of my voodoo, with NO ACCESSORIES. “We can’t afford what you want.” They’ll fucking afford for my birthday. I’ll make sure of that. [Brother] wanted a cheap, fast processor, AMD Duron 850. I told him that Durons/Athlons overheat too much. He doesn’t care.
[Friend] Sucks to be him. Just don’t let him get his hands on yours.
[Me] His PC overheats after being on for 20 minutes.
[Friend] I just don’t trust or like brothers. Mine steals too much.
[Me] He EXPECTS ME TO GIVE HIM MY CASE FAN. I told him that I won’t give him my case fan, I’d have to shut down my PC to do so, and his PC is not more important than the servers I run. He storms off in a huff and I get to installing his sound card.
[Friend] And?
[Me] He throws a fit that I’m not sitting in front of his PC watching it install. (The installation of the drivers takes a fucking hour. I’m not sitting there for that)
[Friend] The same brother that wrecks cars and shit?
[Me] Yup. Only one sibling in this house.
[Friend] I mean you or your family no offense, but.. Is [Brother] the sort that’s just so whiny, bitchy, overbearing and annoying that the parents give in to get him TO SHUT THE FUCK UP?
[Me] Pretty much, yes. So he sits in front of it and complains that the install is taking too long.
[Friend] I can’t believe how patient you are, honestly.
[Me] I’m a nerd. I hide.
[Friend] … No. You’re fierce. Don’t even joke like that.
[Me] I’m afraid of the guy, okay?
[Friend] …
[Me] He used to beat me over the head with bats
[Friend] I’m going to come, adopt you and leave MY brother with him. I’d kill to have you for a sister.
[Me] Ditto.
[Friend] I drilled fear into my brothers. My hate knows no boundaries. They might be bigger, but I’m scarier.
[Me] I install the sound card. [Brother] plugs in the speakers. No luck. (I’m downstairs now, my dad needs help with a video game.) He runs downstairs.
“Fix my computer, there’s no sound.”
I tell him to try all the plugs in the back (He bought a 3 speaker system, and a sound card meant for an 8 speaker system. Fuckwit.)
He comes down again. “There’s still no sound.”
I go upstairs, and I test the drivers, etc.
He chips in, “Well, there was sound, but it was all scratchy.”
…. “So you’re telling me that there WAS sound, even though you told me there wasn’t?”
“Well, yeah. But Scratchy music isn’t sound.”
[Friend] Ooong. I’m going to kill him.
[Me] “[Brother], that doesn’t matter, there was still sound, so that means that there’s nothing wrong with the card. When you told me there was no sound what-”
“But it was sc-“
“There was still sound.”
“But, it w-“
“There was still-”
“WHY YOU ALWAYS GOTTA BE SUCH A BITCH TO ME?! [insert incoherent bitching]” It was something like, “You’re always a fucking bitch and I’m fucking sick of it!”
And I told him, “Give my back my fucking hardware.”
“FINE TAKE IT!”
So I took back all my stuff, shut down my PC, reinstalled it, RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. After I told him I wouldn’t shut it down. I found out the problem with his sound before I took it all out, too. 1. Internal volume control was too low 2. External was too high 3. Subwoofer’s bass was UP ALL THE WAY. 4. LIMP BIZKIT